Being Realistic & A Little About Me

While I love a good dirty movie, I also realistically understand that these movies are not all made to be treated as film. At least, not as cinematic masterpieces. Mostly, this blog is for me to have some fun and explore dirty movies in a way that I don't see them get explored often. 

I actually have a small history with adult films. The R. Rose pen name actually comes from it! When I was in college, back in the early 2000's, I got the opportunity to write a couple of X-rated features that actually got produced. I got an inside look into what creatively went into creating these films. What I learned is that there are people who take these movies seriously. They are trying to make something good, that the audience will enjoy, and they are always focused on perfecting their craft to make the best product possible. 

It sounds weird saying that, but it is 100% what I felt when working with the industry professionals. While my time in the adult film industry was very short, it is something that I am not only grateful for, but also oddly proud of. I was able to get scripts of mine produced! How many people can say that? 

While I am not going to put the titles of the films here, I am going to try and talk about the ones I can find in individual posts down the line. 

Also, some personal info to kind of give you an idea where I am coming from. I am a gay man that came from a fairly conservative background. While I considered never really considered myself sexually repressed growing up, it wasn't until I found the world of adult films that I realized how much sex and sexuality interested me on a psychological, and in a lot of ways artistic, level. My perception of these films was shaped by the sheer wonder that I had the first time I saw my first X-Rated feature. It was Misty Beethoven: The Musical by the way. There was a singing penis. It is etched into my brain for eternity. The soundtrack is on Spotify. 

That love of all things naughty spills over into R-rated and mainstream films and TV shows as well. Sex and sexuality in film and storytelling is something that truly interests me.  

Outside of hardcore material, I love movies like Basic Instinct and Wild Things that push the boundaries of what was being seen in theaters. These are well budgets, mainstream movies that play with sexuality in a way that is both exciting, and also a little forbidden. A movie like The Hunger is shocking in its mix of horror and erotica, as we watch Catherine Deneuve seduce Susan Sarandon. I can still remember the surprise I felt when James Spader and Elias Koteas had a surprisingly tender love scene in David Cronenberg's underrated Crash. I still enjoy the surprisingly detailed lore and nihilism of the infamous anime film Urotsukidoji. There is a wonder attached to these movies, because they contain something that we have been told is forbidden. There is an excitement to watching them. As I get older that excitement has faded. I am 40 now. I have seen plenty, and I no longer have the conservative outside influence around me telling me that sex and sexuality is dirty. Still, even I get a little thrill that I am doing something naughty when I watch Showgirls for the 30th time. 

I know, a gay man loving Showgirls. How shocking. 

I do understand what the purpose of most of these films is for, but that doesn't mean I cannot approach the material critically. From that short glimpse into the adult film industry that I had back when I was a 20 something college student showed me that actual thought was put into making some of these movies. Even if that thought was "Let's show em a good time!" 

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